Move over, Wonder Woman.

Superpowers I have obtained since becoming a mom:

• Ability to always know where the keys are
• Ability to survive on interrupted sleep (at a level known, up till now, only by torture victims)
• Ability to make even boxed macaroni and cheese into something remotely healthy by sneaking in green peas (to which husband exclaimed, "You RUINED it!")
• Ability to never let anyone in the family run out of clean underwear
• Ability to not laugh when boy waits till I get the spoonful of squash right to his lips, then blows a tremendous raspberry.

Superpowers I still need to develop:

• Ability to deal with geckos (there is a TEEMING COLONY of them outside our front door)
• Ability to fake being pulled together on days following rough nights
• Ability to whip up dinner from whatever's in the pantry, like a kitchen MacGuyver
• Ability to display perfect patience when boy pulls my hair, scratches my neck, gooses my upper arm or bites me YET AGAIN
• Ability to clip and remember to use coupons at the grocery store, plus keep track of double- and triple-coupon days and sale flyers